The law may not be friendly to women in polygamous marriages, 18. While it is true that Islam permits polygyny, it does not require or impose it: marriage can only occur by mutual consent, and a bride is able to stipulate that her husband-to-be is not to take a second wife. Receive weekly tips & tricks to improve your love life. Check your inbox or spam folder now to confirm your subscription. Monogamy is by far the norm in Muslim societies, as most men cannot afford to maintain more than one family, and many of those who could would rather not. A polygamous marriage is when a man has more than one wife at the same time. If what comes to mind when you hear polygamy is a marital arrangement of one guy with more than one wife, you are not wrong. 4 As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the Lord his God, as the heart of David his father had been. To make matters worse, if a man is running a polygamy arrangement where the wives are living separately in order to avoid frequent domestic flights, that adds more to the overall domestic expense. This is especially true for men. Even if a woman is working hard and being the best she can be for her husband, she may end up helping herself in a way. Women in polygynous unions tend to marry at a younger age, into a setup that, by its very nature, fosters jealousy, competition, and conflict, with instances of co-wives poisoning one anothers offspring in a bid to further their own. Hence, in case you aspire to such a lifestyle, you may have to keep it secret and discrete instead of bragging about it in front of your friends. Therefore, polygamy can also make quite a lot of sense since cheating would no longer be necessary and feelings would not be hurt as often as in monogamous relationships. 4 Reasons Why Ramadan Is A Point Of Change, What is Ramadan? On the other hand, a guy can father as many children as possible as long as there's a willing female. Whether it's a one-man/multiple women relationship, polyandry, or group marriage, one of the benefits of polygamy (when looking at the pros and cons of the practice), is the low risk of getting bored. Polyandry: Any Muslim woman can marry more than one husband at the same time. This may further lead to mental health breakdown. In turn, this also implies that you will have more connections and a stronger social network. The former is when a woman marries more than one guy, while the latter is a marital arrangement, where four or more adults are sexually and romantically involved with each other. But there is only one condition: the husband is totally responsible for all his wives. As Allah the Almighty says: (89) And most surely, We have diversified for mankind in this Recital (c) every kind of parable, but most of mankind refused anything but constant denial. That said, polygyny remains very common across much of West Africa. Different people want different things. Position One: Islam restricts or forbids polygyny. If you are looking at the pros and cons of polygamy for yourself or a friend, remember kids are fragile, and polygamy isn't as common as monogamy anymore. So the woman is in an advantageous position because she is maintained, cared for, and is given a dwelling to live in as well as the fulfilment of passions. While the practice may not be legal according to the African countries' official marriage laws, since bigamy is totally punishable, polygamy is also not frowned upon. Guess what? In turn, those children may not get enough food or also not have the opportunity to get proper education or some children will be treated with more care than others. Celibacy doesn't necessarily have to mean being alone, miserable, and without any male companion. Even in monogamous societies, men often enter into sexual relationships with other women who . Household tension may be relatively higher, 26. With polygamy, there's technically an acceptance of human nature by the parties involved, which may slightly reduce jealousy and the need for divorce. In religious perspective, many religious people think that monogamy is the way to go and that anything else is not in line with religious beliefs. 3. Research from the United Nations shows that women in such marriages/families are prone to serious emotional abuse. The wives in a polygamy setting are almost always in competition, which can be a good thing as long as it's healthy. That is because the men have to take on the responsibility of maintenance and care over the women, whilst the women are looked after. To conclude, clean, pure and pious living cannot be realized by human endeavor alone, since humans do not have the ultimate knowledge that ensures their own welfare. For instance, if you want to get a demanding corporate job that pays quite a lot of money, your chances will increase significantly if you have connections inside the company. . Nevertheless, it must be stressed that in light of the fact that the most important benefit of marriage is familial love, tranquility, and affection, monogamy is far preferable to polygamy. Plural marriage helps to increase the numbers of the ummah (nation, Muslim community). Not only this but also maintaining clear pure lineage of children, keeping proper kinship and, having natural healthy family life for the upbringing of new generations. Sex keeps relationships together. the time he stays and the money he spends. Advantages And Disadvantages Of Polygamous Marriage: Polygamous marriage is the type of marriage where one can have more that one partner, its the opposite of monogamy. Buddhism and Islam are religions that do not consider polygamous marriages a sin. Answer (1 of 2): Patrilineal descent is a system of tracing descent through the male line, in which children are considered to belong to the same descent group as their father. Consequently, in order to give people the option to explore new partners and to make life more interesting in general, polygamy can also make quite a lot of sense in this regard. Conclusion: Polygamous women though claimed that polygamy has disadvantages but to them, divorce is not an option. Get the help you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today. Altogether, it's an easy situation to avoid by not going into polygamy in the first place. Recommended: Youngest Presidents in the world 2022. Why Are So Many Indian Arranged Marriages Successful. Today, most countries that permit polygamyinvariably in the form of polygynyare countries with a Muslim majority or sizeable Muslim minority. Even in monogamous societies, powerful men often establish long-term sexual relationships with women other than their wives (concubinage), although in this case the junior partners and their children born to them do not enjoy the same legal protections as the legitimate wife and children. The cons of polygamy go beyond when the marriage is still alive. All this is only aggravated by the brideprice, a payment from the groom to the brides family. And we revealed to Abraham, Ishmael, Isaac, Jacob, the Descendants, Jesus, Job, Jonah, Aaron, and Solomon, and to David We gave the book of Psalms. Quraan 4:163, And Noah, We guided before; and among his descendants, David and Solomonand Job and Joseph and Moses and Aaron. The practice of polygamy naturally leads to a larger family compared to monogamous relationships. Additionally, men are more prone to diseases and illnesses than women; men are exposed to war and battle, and to dangers. The bottom line is, men sneak around because they are not permitted to have multiple wives. if you have minimum Two wives then you are Not weak in Justice. Also, women are prone by nature to the monthly cycle (menstruation), child birth and post-natal bleeding. Shall Solomon fall, that was the beauty of Israel, and so great a blessing of his generation? Polygamy promotes jealousy within families. In Europe, this was generally achieved through the feudal rule of primogeniture (first born), still practised among the British aristocracy, by which the eldest legitimate son inherits the entire estate (or almost) of both his parents. On the contrary, Islam has some reasons why it allows polygamy, such as assert woman's rights, her right for married, make a family, have and raise their children. This chapter begins with as melancholy a but as almost any we find in all the Bible. Essay on polygamy is better than monogamy. II. So if he was to marry more than one woman then those difficulties would go away. There's no subtle way to put it in this pros and cons article; most women in polygamous relationships or families are only doing a great job hiding how they truly feel. Religious doctrines, modern laws over the years contributed to the shift from polygamy to monogamy. So the Christian has only one wife. Venereal diseases are multiplying in incidence numbers and speed of spread. The disadvantage of living in an extended type of family is shouldering more expenses for their basic needs. As mentioned earlier, the new spouse can be at another location or under one roof as it is practiced in many African countries. In places where polygamy is technically legal or allowed, there are usually no laws that accommodate the splitting of properties when divorce scenarios come up. However, cultural or religious traditions made him bring in subsequent wives in a non-formal or non-legal way. In general, polygamy allows you to have a bigger selection of partners at the same time and in case one partner annoys you quite a lot, you can simply spend your time with your other spouses and neglect the annoying spouse for a while Thus, a bigger variety of different partners can make your life easier in the sense that you can choose with whom you want to spend your time with. Benefits - You are following the First Main order of Allah. Let's face it; chances are, a guy will have a favorite among his spouses, perhaps because she cooks well, pleases him more, hardly says no to sex, etc. One advantage of polygamy in Islam is that it can provide financial and emotional support for a man's family. Thus, depending on the respective region, it can also make quite a lot of sense to live a polygamous lifestyle in order to increase social status and the overall level of acceptance in society. The United Nations recommends that the union be completely prohibited or discouraged. Perhaps, knowing the purpose of a synthesis essay will help you view the subject in a better light. It is perhaps telling that polygamy is practiced in almost all of the 20 most unstable countries on the Fragile States Index. This may not be the case every time as some men only find themselves in polygamy due to being serial adulterers. Religion . 1 King Solomon, however, loved many foreign women besides Pharaohs daughterMoabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Sidonians and Hittites. If he wants more, he'll just marry more wives without technically hurting anyone's feelings since the wives know the type of relationship they signed up for. It was the sugar and the refined carbohydrates! Unhappiness, loneliness, sense of competition and jealousy, and lack of intimacy with the spouse were identified as disadvantages of polygyny. While polygamy has many pros and cons, the cons can come in handy for a woman who suddenly takes up the decision to be celibate. The Quran in one verse states that men will not be able to be completely fair and advise one wife to avoid unjustness. See my related article, Polyamory: A New Way of Loving. However, having multiple wives will increase the chances of many children, which will also increase the possibility of passing special genes to many progenies. It can even offer financial security, especially when the man is rich. While many monogamous relationships can end in divorce due to infidelity or, it offers a platform of equality, fairness and has legal protection for involved parties under the law of virtually all countries. However, there will probably be less argument in polygamy when a wife says no to her husband's sexual move because she's tired or not in the mood. The women's ways of coping included the use of religion, faith and a strong sisterly bond formed with the co-wives. Having Varieties: when there is multiple partners you have different varieties. Ahlan was founded in Cairo, Egypt in 2011 and has developed and grown ever since to include different activities that serve our main inspiration. 2. Getting bored: Another advantage of polygamous marriage is that there will be lower risk of people getting bored in their marriage after the whole wedding and maybe child bearing couples tend to get bored in the marriage. Islam Marriage. But as I mentioned earlier, we are jealous and territorial creatures and will, at the end of the day, prefer being with someone we can call our own. Children may have a hard time understanding, 27. Now, I'm not trying to use this point to justify adultery or promote polygamy, but let's face it, the alarming rate of divorce proves that the soulmate ideology is laughable. Is it intended like, Mashaallah it was pleasure to read this because I have been seeing my Late dad in my dreams for so, My advice is that you travel for knowledge often for Allah's sake -- and to physically move to a thriving, Ustadh, you have mentioned it is preferred that someone has recommendations from the leaders of a local Salafi community before, Advice on Polygynous Marriages And to Women Seeking Marriage in General. Polygamy has many disadvantages, according to this post. In a setting where there's an equal contribution of effort, the wives can alternate handling the house chores. Your children will get to grow up in an environment with a greater connection with more children. What's interesting is that the wives of such alpha males are also placed on the same pedestal society places their husbands, so both husbands and wives sometimes enjoy the praise that comes from polygamy. Whoever Actualises Tawheed will enter Paradise without a Reckoning: Ahmad An-Najmi, on There Is No Marriage Without A Guardian And The Conditions of a Valid Nikh by Shaikh Al-Fawzn (Bulgh Al-Marm), Polygamy in Islam, and women it is not permitted to marry: (Bulgh al-Marm) by Shaikh al-Fawzn, Advice on Polygynous Marriages And to Women Seeking Marriage in General, The Excellence of Makkah, its History and its Sacredness (The Masjid al-Harm). When this reality sets in, it can make someone feel miserable, unhappy, and depressed, which may affect one's mental health. The advantages of polygamy: Care, warmth and affection provided by wives or mistresses. A man who has a relationship with several women at the same time satisfies many of his sexual needs and fantasies in this way. Learn all about polygamy in Islam and why women can't marry four men the same as men can. In monogamous relationships, an only child may only get to mingle with other kids and learn social skills when they get to school or other external playgroups. Let us enquire into the occasions and particulars of it. People who have multiple partners have a lower incentive to cheat on their partners. Now add cases of manipulation to get the guy's attention and other misunderstandings, then what you'll have is a recipe for regular "royal rumble.". More connections: You cant compare the connection of a man with 5 wives and 15 educated and working children to a man with 1 wife and 3 children, the former will definitely be more richer and connected than the latter. In turn, the level of dependence on their partner is enormous and those spouses will often not be able to leave the marriage due to financial reasons, even though they might not be happy in their marriage at all. Financial downtime may be harder to manage. Because there will be competition among the wives to please him, he probably won't care that much if any of his wives threaten to leave or throw tantrums for attention. 9 Celia Milton Owner/lead Officiant (2006-present) Author has 43.2K answers and 73.3M answer views 10 mo Related What are two main reasons that make you oppose polygamy? Consequently, people who live in regions where religious beliefs are quite important may also have a quite hard time living a polygamous lifestyle since they may get socially excluded by the local population due to that. Its well known that polygamy in Islam is one of the most controversial issues that spark from time to time in Islamic societies because most people dont know what is meant by polygamy from an Islamic perspective. So, instead of waiting for a single guy that may never come, settling to be a man's second or third wife might not be such a bad idea. There are so many cultural practices that may seem weird elsewhere but are totally seen as a good thing where they are practiced. In some cases, the guy acquires or rents multiple houses for his spouses, where he can visit and spend time with them separately. Polygamy can encourage hard work and healthy competition, 16. Much of the world frowns on the practice of polygamy. Gay & LGBTQ Discrimination. since this thread is abnout advantages, I will mention them first. Apart from serial cheats and highly undisciplined men, a guy that has multiple wives or spouses technically has more excitement going on under one roof. Not because he's sick or tired but because he's with someone else. too much laundry. So women are left behind, single and no longer married. [size=16pt] ADVANTAGES OF POLYGAMY [/color][/size] 1. Recommended: Countries that produces the best music in the world. And in reality, in this there is a greater benefit for women than there is for men. 4. 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